I’m becoming a morning exerciser, but that doesn’t keep me from being afraid of the dark….
An ongoing issue of my life has been an overactive imagination when it comes to the dark. I remember being afraid of the Sandman and believing that there was a viscious wild cat that lived on our stairs to the attic that would run down and attack me if I stepped onto the carpet in the hallway between my bedroom and the bathroom in the middle of the night. I remember getting lost in the bathroom at a campground in the night because I couldn’t decipher which tent was our on the way out and crying there until my mom came and found me….we were like 10 feet away.
I don’t know what it is about the dark that takes hold of me sometimes? Especially because I love to sleep in a very dark room. I’m kind of a night owl too, and I’m not sure if that’s because I’m secretly afraid of the dark? However, these morning runs have been the worst for that active imagination. It doesn’t help that I am still wearing my old, beat up glasses to run in. They have cracks that make things “move” and they’re not the right prescription so things sometime are out of focus far away. I often see shadows and people that aren’t there. It’s the kind of thing that the music helps me tune out, but also pushes me a little harder and faster.
Fear is something that’s held me back in a lot of ways too. And each time I think about this yoga reading by Kathleen O’Brien
Let go of guilt,
It’s okay to make the same mistakes again.
Let go of obsessions,
They seldom turn out the way you planned.
Let go of hate,
It’s a waste of Love.
Let go of blaming others,
You are responsible for your own destiny.
Let go of fantasies
So reality can come true.
Let go of self-pity,
Someone else may need you.
Let go of wanting,
Cherish what you have.
Let go of fear,
It’s a waste of Faith.
Let go of despair,
Change comes from acceptance and forgiveness.
Let go of the past,
The future is here, right now.
This morning I was struggling to figure out which thing to focus on for my 30 days post, but then Aqua came on and reminded me….
Give me the strength, to face this test of mine
So, Day Three of my 30 days is to face my fears this year. I don’t want them to hold me back any longer and I don’t want to give them power.
What are you afraid of?