Wellness Wednesday #18 – Wellness Vision: Self Love and Responsibility

Last week I decided to focus on the area of Self Responsibility and Love in order to make sure that MY wellness is a priority. I did this because I felt I have been making bad choices and allowing others’ judgements of me to influence my decision making process. I decided that I needed to be a priority in my own life.

Every semester, when teaching about wellness, I ask my students to first come up with a Wellness Vision for the semester. What would it look like for them to have a well and whole semester? I usually try to give them an example of what it would mean to me…..

Continue reading “Wellness Wednesday #18 – Wellness Vision: Self Love and Responsibility”

Wellness Wednesday #17 – Step Two

For the past week I have been debating on which area of focus to start with for this new attempt to really get my wellness in check. You can read about that here:

Wellness Wednesday #16 – Calling for a Redo

Well, I think I am going to stick with my original plan and focus on the area of Self Responsibility and Love in order to make sure that MY wellness is a priority.

Continue reading “Wellness Wednesday #17 – Step Two”

Wellness Wednesday #7 – Changing My Mind

I haven’t been as successful as I had hoped with posting weekly Wellness Wednesday posts, but I feel like I have been better about reflecting upon these elements of wellness. When last we “talked” we were discussing Feelings. Today I chose to combat some of my negative attitudes and emotions toward chiropractors and I went to one to have my shoulder evaluated. If you follow my training on Map My Run you will have seen many posts this past week about my shoulder clicking and popping. I may have an injury, but… Continue reading “Wellness Wednesday #7 – Changing My Mind”

Wellness Wednesday #6 – Under Pressure!

It’s been 15 days since my last post. However, I’m not too bummed about it. I’m still being far more regular than I was last fall and that is an improvement by anyone’s measure. The last Wellness Wednesday post was about Eating. That can cause a lot of stress for anyone to handle in the best cases. For me, my eating of late has been all over the place. I find myself choosing and wanting to choose more things that I consider “healthy”….although I hate using that word.

Recently I read a post on Fit is a Feminist Issue about tracking the variety of foods you eat. We are kind of in a rut at our house with meals and produce and other plant based foods. Tonight will be one of our favorites….burrito bowls. This usually consists of rice and beans and avocados and salsa and whatever else we dream to put into the bowl. I know, I know….the last post was about EATING, so why am I still talking about it? Well, because Eating tends to lead to stress for some people and stress is one of our FEELINGS, and that’s the main focus of our discussion today… Continue reading “Wellness Wednesday #6 – Under Pressure!”

The Word “DOWN”

I searched my old posts for the word “DOWN” today and found a fair amount for the past few years. Why? Because (although not currently formally diagnosed) I suffer from depression from time to time. It’s something I sought treatment for once in my life. Treatment that was offered didn’t work for me. It was a combination of medications and therapy. I found neither to be helpful. I’ve found exercise to be helpful and journaling to be helpful, but both are sometimes just patches on a gaping whole in my heart. Today the patch isn’t holding. Today I am down.

I decided to get on here and write instead of continuing to lay in bed and feel depressed. I can feel depressed and hopeless while not laying in bed. I also feel sad, scared, and angry. The anger is usually what motivates me to start moving. And then when I think about being angry and how it hurts to feel angry, I get sad again. And then I start crying and trying to figure out what would help. Time. That’s about it. I just need time to move from this state of being to the next state of being.

I read an interesting article on NBCNews.com the other day:

How Being Angry Can (Sometimes) Be Good for You

but I’m not interested in being angry right now. I want to feel good and good seems a million miles away, but getting out of bed is one of the first steps in the right direction. Writing here is my second step. This tells me a little more about how to be me:

I take little steps.

This was really evident in the way that I approached running awhile back. I wanted to get more consistent and faster, so I started running the shortest course I had and added on a little at a time. I need to remember that it’s not big steps that motivate me, it’s little ones.  And

I’m a marathoner.

When I work on a project, like myself or work, I take a long time to do it. Everything in life takes me time. And sometimes that means I have to step away from the work in order to better assess if I’m headed in the right direction. Today I needed to get in bed and just be for a minute….I needed to get away from life for a minute to reassess…and then start back up again. Even this far into writing and I’m already feeling a little more “normal”. Finally,

Sometimes I just can’t decide who I am.

When thinking about the promotion vs. prevention focused personalities I’d say I’m pretty much a split down the middle. Promotion focused individuals are looking for achievement; something I’m always seeking….to feel like I’ve finished something and done it successfully. Prevention focused people are seeking to avoid consequences like loss and punishment; this is also me. I am a health and fitness professional partly because I want to avoid the health problems that have been prevalent in my family members. I budget because I’m afraid of being in debt. I had a speeding ticket and am now terrified of getting another. Yet, I’m always looking for gains. Sometimes….I’m just not one or the other.

More of what I’ve learned about myself today is that it’s okay to be me, even when me is not who I want to be.

Please share a few of your thoughts and join me tomorrow as I finish exploring this portion of Rubin’s book.

I Need More Gretchen! – The Call to Self-Care

So, a few of weeks ago I read/listened to a pair of posts/podcasts by Gretchen Rubin:

A Little Happier: More Advice about How to Be Successful–Check Every Box.

A Little Happier: Don’t Check Every Box.

I know that just looking at the title of each of those seems like a major contradiction, but Gretchen Rubin has these “Secrets of Adulthood” that she lives by and one of those is

The opposite of a profound truth is also true.

Her two podcasts are about being successful and applying for a job, but I took the idea to heart in regards to self-care. It draws back to the topic I was writing about last week in my course review of the Inclusivity Training I did where Chelsea reminded us over and over again to

Drink as you pour.

If I am to take care of myself I need to check all of the boxes and make myself into the person I want to be; this will help me to be happy and is the only thing I truly have control over. I need to meet my own expectations. I need to push myself to be the best that I can. I need to think positively about myself and my own capabilities.

But, I also don’t need to check all of the boxes for anyone else, or even, sometimes myself. Sometimes it’s okay to spend the entire day in my pajamas lounging on the couch and watching tv with my kids. Sometimes it’s okay to eat pancakes from the fridge in the middle of the day. Sometimes it’s okay to say no to a workout.

The key is balance. I’m in the middle of a big project in my life and some of that means checking the boxes off to meet a goal I have. This would include

  • Getting in my 4 runs each week
  • Trying to be active each day
  • Avoiding eating as many animal products as possible
  • Choosing to eat less processed food
  • Making time to breathe and to meditate
  • Reading more
  • Writing more
  • Spending more time playing with my children
  • Taking care of myself when I need it

This is all part of My Best Body Happiness Project that was inspired by reading Rubin’s first book. I think that something inside of me has been trying to get back to this idea of balance lately. I will be writing on Thursday about where I am in my project and Friday will be a book review from the last book I read.

Currently though, Gretchen Rubin is helping me again as the next book on my reading list was Better than Before, her book about habits that introduces the Four Tendencies (I’m an Obliger). There will be a lot more self-care going on, a lot more meditation/reflection, and I’m sure that I’ll learn a lot more about myself and my habits as I go through this new book.

Have you read Better than Before?

What do you do for self-care?

What boxes do you not check?

Drink As You Pour

Drink as you pour ~ Ma Jaya

Yesterday I finally finished going through the Inclusivity Training with Chelsea Jackson Roberts. Throughout the experience she repeatedly quoted her mentor, Ma Jaya, as saying “Drink as you pour” as a reminder that we must give to ourselves as we give to others.

I had considered writing this post as a Meditation Monday post, but I’m currently in the middle of another How to Meditate series and didn’t want to interrupt that flow. But it’s important to consider this statement both as a meditation topic and also as a guiding principle of life. Think about it…..how can I give to others and also nourish myself? I’ve written before about selfless acts (remember Phoebe?) and also self-care and the need for both in life, not just a “yoga life”.

First, let’s talk course review. I liked the online course and it gave me a lot of great ideas for things to do with my own classes and material for a course I was working on for NETA. However, the format of the course was not completely to my liking. I prefer in person training and the ability to ask questions/get feedback along the way. I have been told that I will get feedback on all of my “assignments/reflections”, but I have finished the course and only once received feedback. I think they had too many people signed up. Also, there were LIVE Q&A sessions that you could attend online. I started the course late and they were Wednesday evenings during our regular dinner time, so it wasn’t possible for me to “attend”. I watched them all later as they appeared throughout the course. It didn’t feel much like Q&A to me and I don’t think I gained much from that perspective.

The thing I probably enjoyed the most was the personal journey attained through reflection and homework assignments. I also REALLY liked learning a few of the breathing exercises and used the Yoga Nidra exercise to help me fall asleep while in my hotel room in Asheville. It’s something I will use as I travel more often as I had really wonderful sleep afterward.

In reflecting throughout the course I found that the material I choose to read (see an upcoming Fave Reads Friday post) are often reflective of my own journey through this world and understanding my own power, privilege, and prejudice. I still firmly believe that I have little prejudice except for against people who are strongly prejudice or who are just outright mean.

For example, I got someone kicked out of the Chevelle concert this past weekend. Why? Because she was a bully. She was harassing two younger concert goers…intentionally…because they wouldn’t move and let her to the front. They had been there since 630pm when the doors opened and rightfully gained their front row status. They stayed, the entire time, without once going to the bathroom or for refreshments. My hubby and I kept trading off and holding our spaces that we also attained at 630pm so that we (because we’re old) could go and get water and use the facilities. She arrived up front during Chevelle’s performance, over 3 hours later. She physically hit and kicked them, slammed her body into them, and yelled verbal obscenities into their ears. Others around us laughed it off to an extent, uncomfortably, as the fact that we’re at a concert and you get banged around. But, I had had enough.

This is not what I considered “concert behavior” and I tattled on the woman. I’m not afraid to say that I did this and she knew it was me, but she didn’t come after me. She went deeper after the two under 21’s. She was clearly in her 40’s or older, she was a larger woman, and she used her weight to throw around her intoxicated and irate body at people who had done nothing wrong.

Eventually, etiquette won out and the kind security officer I complained to had her ejected….to the applause of the people around us. The concert went on and was much more enjoyable for me at that point. The two next to us thanked my husband (not me) when they left. I wasn’t hurt by this; I felt good about standing up for someone else. I am privileged in some ways and disadvantaged in others in my life, but I don’t often stand by when others are being singled out.

My reflections in this course helped me to come to the conclusion that I could do more in standing up for the mistreatment of others. I am considering my options in pursuing this.

Have you considered your power, privilege and prejudice?

How do you drink as you pour?

What courses have you taken lately that have taught you something more about yourself?